Pop Quiz

Several of you asked for another quiz, so here's a brand-spankin' new one- now get off my back already !

Multiple Choice:
Lawdy likes to touch _____ .
a) the boys in G's gym class
b) unsuspecting female staff members
c) himself in the staff room
d) all of the above

The Irritable Texan yells at everyone because _____ .
a) he can
b) his prostate is flaring up again
c) his fitness shake contains twice the normal amount of steroids
d) both a and b

How many noisy neighbors live in the apartment below us ?
a) 2- average Dan the fix-it man and smokin' hot Cody
b) 3- Dan, Cody, and Cody's dorky brother, Chris
c) 170, from the sound of it most nights
d) any combination of the above

Shannon's students like to ______ when they erupt.
a) hurl tape dispensers (weighted with cement in the bases) at her
b) throw desks and chairs at her
c) stab her with the pencils they earned for good behavior
d) do all of the above and then some

My grandmother stalks me via:
a) "gashopper" (remember Trevor ?)
b) internet
c) the voices in my head
d) praying mantis

True/False:
On Tuesday morning, AJ and I ignored the Pledge Of Allegiance and debated the pros and cons of goat milk instead. T F

Numbers:
1. The amount of money I owe you this month: $_____.___

2. Number of times Richard repeats the same SpongeBob dialogue before I threaten to remove all his vital organs: _____

3. The hourly amount my pay was cut by, multiplied by the number of houseplants I claim as dependents on my W4 = _____.

4. If Lucifer runs through the soccer game with his wiener hanging out at 3 mph, and Lawdy is running towards the field at 5 mph, how many goals can the opposing team score before Lawdy catches Lucifer and drags him into the locker room for a discrete grope ? _____

5. Number of fatalities that almost happened in Shannon's class this week minus the number of subs who refuse to cover her room this year = _____

6. Tammy can attach _____ clothespins to her labial folds at one time.

Hope you made the grade...