Free At Last
Covering all the major educational domains...
SPEECH AND COMMUNICATION
* "Chocolate chips kill you !" - Tweeker Crust during snack time
* "Get out !" - Crust again, when Elvin arrived on Tuesday morning
* "Liar !" - Centennia yelled this when I said her mom didn't want her eating all damn day
* "Shit !" Jo Jo- he was caught doing something naughty while the lights were off
* "Sandwiches !" Centennia shouted this during music time. Noone knows why.
* "She was kind of chubby- I was apprehensive at first- but she was rich !" -Igor, discussing his bi-polar ex-girlfriend with us and impressing me yet again with his depth.
BEHAVIOR MANAGEMENT
* Igor told a crying Zeke he couldn't go home yet, then spent 15 minutes repeating "where do you want to go ?" (um, that would be home, dillhole). I'll bet you can guess where I want Igor to go...
* Startled by Alan suddenly chomping down on her finger, Babs reflexively smacked him.
* Emil beat his dad like a bitch, then took on Dr. P. and half his classroom. If I had that haircut, I'd be angry, too.
HEALTH AND SAFETY
* Cheeser obliviously watched Elvin playing with water at the drinking fountain while he also attempted to vacuum the carpet (as in: with a plugged-in electrical device, while splashing water and touching metal).
HYGIENE
* Changing Jo Jo's diaper is always an adventure. I'd like to share with you all what I've learned from the experience: dudes, you need to wax/shave/Nair your asses for more than just cosmetic reasons. I'm just sayin'...
* Another sulfuric stench wafted through the halls on Monday, but that was nothing compared to the fragrance of Esther's armpits festering in Room 604. All the other staff members clustered together under the arctic air vent for relief, and I kept myself warm by laughing at Igor, who grimaced each time she walked past him.
* Since he got fired for socking Ray Ray back, Kill Bill has been sleeping on the floor of his office and sponge-bathing in the employee bathroom.
PHYSICAL EDUCATION
* Rai perfected her Ninja skills by karate-chopping Asi (when she wasn't elbowing her in the face). Rai also worked on breaking glass with the force of her screams.
* Crust "Ninganinganinganing"ed and jumped high enough to hit his head on the ceiling. * Zeke and Mike engaged in a friendly wrestling match- well, a not so friendly match, actually, because Zeke repeatedly heeled Mike in the sac.
SOCIAL SKILLS
* Randall launched into a tirade about how washing dishes is still a woman's job, then lamented over his inability to hook up with the ladies.
* Chad (student) repeatedly admonished Esther (TOR disguised as staff) to stop bothering him so he could get his work done.
* Loo Anne told me to "Just quit then, why do I have to talk about it with you ?", threatened to give me a bad reference, and got her ass reported to HR twice in the same day (by Yours Truely). Boy, that was fun ! The best part was getting to tell her "I don't need your reference."
MATH
* Can you believe I'll be making more at my $9 hr. pre-school job than I do here ? I blame the 6-hour days, not to mention (but I will anyway), minimum days, pupil-free days, unpaid weeks during summer vacation, Christmas vacation, Spring Break, Labor Day, yada yada yada...
ACCESSING TRANSPORTATION
* Having had enough of Melinda's trumpeting in his ear and kicking his seat, Alan turned around and punched her in the eye as the cab pulled away.
* Having observed Rafa striking manly poses in his long raincoat, two Bridgeport aides deliberated over whether he was a parent or some pervert they needed to report.
I'm officially out of The Hell Group for good (or evil, in my case) - I've so enjoyed griping with you all...
SPEECH AND COMMUNICATION
* "Chocolate chips kill you !" - Tweeker Crust during snack time
* "Get out !" - Crust again, when Elvin arrived on Tuesday morning
* "Liar !" - Centennia yelled this when I said her mom didn't want her eating all damn day
* "Shit !" Jo Jo- he was caught doing something naughty while the lights were off
* "Sandwiches !" Centennia shouted this during music time. Noone knows why.
* "She was kind of chubby- I was apprehensive at first- but she was rich !" -Igor, discussing his bi-polar ex-girlfriend with us and impressing me yet again with his depth.
BEHAVIOR MANAGEMENT
* Igor told a crying Zeke he couldn't go home yet, then spent 15 minutes repeating "where do you want to go ?" (um, that would be home, dillhole). I'll bet you can guess where I want Igor to go...
* Startled by Alan suddenly chomping down on her finger, Babs reflexively smacked him.
* Emil beat his dad like a bitch, then took on Dr. P. and half his classroom. If I had that haircut, I'd be angry, too.
HEALTH AND SAFETY
* Cheeser obliviously watched Elvin playing with water at the drinking fountain while he also attempted to vacuum the carpet (as in: with a plugged-in electrical device, while splashing water and touching metal).
HYGIENE
* Changing Jo Jo's diaper is always an adventure. I'd like to share with you all what I've learned from the experience: dudes, you need to wax/shave/Nair your asses for more than just cosmetic reasons. I'm just sayin'...
* Another sulfuric stench wafted through the halls on Monday, but that was nothing compared to the fragrance of Esther's armpits festering in Room 604. All the other staff members clustered together under the arctic air vent for relief, and I kept myself warm by laughing at Igor, who grimaced each time she walked past him.
* Since he got fired for socking Ray Ray back, Kill Bill has been sleeping on the floor of his office and sponge-bathing in the employee bathroom.
PHYSICAL EDUCATION
* Rai perfected her Ninja skills by karate-chopping Asi (when she wasn't elbowing her in the face). Rai also worked on breaking glass with the force of her screams.
* Crust "Ninganinganinganing"ed and jumped high enough to hit his head on the ceiling. * Zeke and Mike engaged in a friendly wrestling match- well, a not so friendly match, actually, because Zeke repeatedly heeled Mike in the sac.
SOCIAL SKILLS
* Randall launched into a tirade about how washing dishes is still a woman's job, then lamented over his inability to hook up with the ladies.
* Chad (student) repeatedly admonished Esther (TOR disguised as staff) to stop bothering him so he could get his work done.
* Loo Anne told me to "Just quit then, why do I have to talk about it with you ?", threatened to give me a bad reference, and got her ass reported to HR twice in the same day (by Yours Truely). Boy, that was fun ! The best part was getting to tell her "I don't need your reference."
MATH
* Can you believe I'll be making more at my $9 hr. pre-school job than I do here ? I blame the 6-hour days, not to mention (but I will anyway), minimum days, pupil-free days, unpaid weeks during summer vacation, Christmas vacation, Spring Break, Labor Day, yada yada yada...
ACCESSING TRANSPORTATION
* Having had enough of Melinda's trumpeting in his ear and kicking his seat, Alan turned around and punched her in the eye as the cab pulled away.
* Having observed Rafa striking manly poses in his long raincoat, two Bridgeport aides deliberated over whether he was a parent or some pervert they needed to report.
I'm officially out of The Hell Group for good (or evil, in my case) - I've so enjoyed griping with you all...
posted by Fredrika Krueger at 10:11 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home